【Love Wants Sex Series 351】Surviving the menopausal crisis…

【Love Wants Sex Series 351】Surviving the menopausal crisis…


Transcript◆Liang Yingxiu

(Kuala Lumpur News) Regarding the topic of the relationship between menopause and marriage, we must first understand what menopause is. According to the definition of the World Health Organization (WHO), most women experience menopause between the ages of 45 and 55, which is caused by the loss of ovarian follicle function and changes in menstrual flow, eventually leading to amenorrhea, vaginal dryness, pain during intercourse, Urinary incontinence, difficulty falling asleep, insomnia, emotional depression and anxiety changes, etc.

Decreased interest in sex during menopause

Women’s menopause is often very painful. In the past, the source of stress for middle-aged women was often the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. However, nowadays, most urban areas are dominated by small families, and the source of stress is usually the relationship between husband and wife or parent-child.

In fact, menopause is a very critical moment in a woman’s growth stage. Some experts even call this stage a turbulent period in life. Because at this stage, they will experience many physical and psychological changes, allowing many women to encounter better ways and attitudes to face life.

Zhang Yujin, a doctor of psychological counseling, pointed out that nowadays, menopause has become a topic of concern to many people. Many countries have established organizations to promote menopause awareness to help the general public understand menopause; but for the relationship between menopause and marriage, such topics may It would be a taboo, especially in our Chinese circles and culture, where this subject is difficult to discuss. Because of this, many women around us have also lost the opportunity to seek help and treatment.

Therefore, she hopes that this topic can help women facing menopause raise their awareness of this aspect. She also hopes that there will be such a space to understand young people’s relationship with marriage. At the same time, she can also use this discussion opportunity to help everyone.

“Having talked about the physiological and psychological changes of women during menopause, in fact, menopause can easily lead to discord between couples. Events that could be tolerated in the past have now become unbearable. During menopause, most but not all women will have less interest in sex, and some You also face problems with sexual intercourse.”

She pointed out that when some women encounter sexual difficulties, they will naturally not share them with their spouses. In addition, studies have pointed out that many men have too little knowledge about menopause, including husbands’ experiences with their wives about what to expect during menopause. It is not known that it will affect sexual function.

Couple relationship quality prevents sexual disorders

The above studies point to several influences, including physical, emotional, social, cultural, and marital relationships. Here, she wants to focus on aspects related to the relationship between husband and wife, a woman’s sexual desires, and past sexual activities.

First/Can a woman’s sexual desire before menopause actually be predicted to be lower after menopause?

Secondly, whether a partner is around or not, it will directly affect the woman’s sexual response and interest. The presence or absence of a spouse, for example, can also be risk factors for sexual function.

Third/The quality of the couple’s relationship. When it comes to the quality of the couple’s relationship, in the study it refers to the wife’s feelings towards her sexual partner; at the same time, another study also pointed out that the husband’s loyalty can also affect the wife’s sexual dysfunction. Therefore, the husband’s understanding of menopause is an important key to the quality of the couple’s relationship.

Adjust to an open mind

Coping with challenges for middle-aged couples

Regarding the impact of menopause on women, most people usually label it with relatively negative words, such as: Past is prime, or even label menopause as a life-or-death obstacle.

So what are the feelings and attitudes of women themselves when facing menopause?

Zhang Yujin pointed out that there was a study many years ago that interviewed women on this topic. This study found that post-menopausal women feel more positively about menopause than pre-menopausal women.

Sharing sexual distress is embarrassing

“Some other studies have also pointed out that a woman’s feelings and attitudes towards menopause are related to her perceived support from her husband. Some research reports have pointed out that husbands’ cognition of menopause has a great impact on wives facing menopause. influence; but many husbands’ understanding of menopause comes from their wives or information on the Internet.”

“In the absence of understanding of menopause, some husbands will adopt a conflict-avoiding attitude towards their wives’ reactions or mentality towards menopause. However, such an attitude will actually worsen the relationship and interaction between husband and wife.”

She said that research also pointed out that many husbands are actually willing to take measures to support their wives going through menopause, but at the same time, some husbands also hold the attitude that doing nothing is the best way to cope.

“On the other hand, wives’ mood swings and changes in sexual interests also cause tension in the relationship between husband and wife. Therefore, when their wives are going through menopause, some husbands also express that the challenges their wives experience include how they feel about sharing sexual aspects. The trouble is a very personal matter; at the same time, it can also be a very embarrassing thing for the husband to talk about emotional support and guidance to help his wife’s mood swings.”

Husband’s opinion affects wife

Of course, husbands will also promote each other’s sex life and communication, but in terms of certain lack of knowledge, they also need medical professionals to use knowledge to target specific difficulties or worries, and medical professionals of the same sex also encourage them to seek help. will.

“Some husbands will think that menopause is a life process, and they will adopt the attitude of doing nothing. It can be seen from this that husbands’ reactions to their wives’ menopause are diverse.”

In summary, judging from different research reports, for menopausal women, husbands are important emotional supports in the family, and their views and attitudes have a profound impact on their wives; but wives’ attitudes and views on menopause and marital relationships , more discussion is needed.

She said that simply speaking, menopause can be a turbulent period that not only tests the quality of a couple’s relationship, but couples can also take advantage of this challenge to create more possibilities and build or improve the quality of their relationship. “Especially to improve the quality of a couple’s relationship, it requires constant adjustment, adaptation and openness to face the various challenges in life.”

Spouses should be tolerant and understanding

Zhang Yujin would like to wish and remind all couples that when facing various challenges during menopause, she also hopes that middle-aged couples can find more creative ideas to prolong their relationship as husband and wife. “I hope that after listening to these incisive explanations, all readers will understand their spouses better and have more tolerance and understanding when facing menopause. A couple’s relationship can last until old age, and there is no way or lack of it. A very important part is tolerance and understanding.

“Tolerance and understanding,

Just try to stand in the other person’s shoes, think and see the other person,

What are the difficulties you face at this moment?

What is the part that he can’t adjust to?

As a lifelong partner, I

How can you accompany him on this journey?

How to accompany him and adjust together?

More data shows that for a woman,

Entering menopause requires having a baby,

Degeneration and aging in all aspects of psychology,

She will be very grateful,

Have a significant other who accompanies, understands and tolerates you all the way. “



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